Raise your hand if you are being marketed to.

The other night, I was flipping through the channels on my Tivo and noticed that a new channel had appeared that I had never noticed. It called to me with the simple name The Tube. Clicked on the listing and was instantly catapulted into the world of, wait for it, music videos! Staring back in my face was a Talking Heads video, followed by Franz Ferninand, and then the Doors! Unfortunately the next video was the Bee Gees, so it isn't exactly perfect.

I am stoked! The co-creator of MTV has struck out on his own, having seen his fantastic creation pummelled to death by the likes of Pimp My Ride and Kevin Federline's ugly mug, and created a new station that bridges the gap of VH1 and MTV, all while actually showing just music videos. That's right. No reality shows, game shows or news. Music. All the time. Coupled with moving pictures.

Thank you Tube. I will be your champion and spread the word to all the the late 20 somethings and early 30 somethings in the land.

Wow - Newman's Own is WEIRD

So I grew up eating lots of iceberg lettuce salads...I mean, hey, those bag salads weren't even around when I was growing up. And on top of those salads, the elixer that made them taste like..well, anything, was Mr. Paul Newman. For years I read the back of the bottle, not quite sure of who this Newman guy was--I had never seen The Sting or anything else he had been in. In fact, for a number of years, I think I actually thought that he simply made Italian Dressing from the basement of his home, occasionally brewing up a batch for a friend at Christmas...(if you have ever read the back of the bottle, this is HILARIOUS).

Anyway, Liz was kind enough to point out the excellent, if not weird copy on the back of the new "Low Fat Sesame Ginger" dressing.

The Great Salad Dressing Balloon Race. An armada of balloons loaded with Low Fat Sesame Ginger. The starters gun - Bazoombah! They all rise majestically into the air. Newman's Own Balloon, with fewer calories, more taste and secretly propelled by charity, flies faster than Kraft and further than Wishbone. First across. First on the ground. El Piloto quaffs mucho quaffs of Newman's Own Low Fat Sesame Ginger in victory. A medium light Italian starlet, daughter of Butch Cassidini, named Bitch Cassidini, leaps into the balloon basket, kisses Piloto, her lips smeared with Newman's Own Low Fat, she murmurs, "You taste of Sicily, of Vesuvius, of Naples, baby", and patting his fanny she whispers, "and no fat."

What?? I can't even articulate how weird and surreal this copy is. Well, let me try:

1. I don't know if I am more creeped out by the phrase "El Piloto quaffs mucho quaffs of Newman's Own Low Fat Sesame Ginger in victory", or the fact that they refer to El Piloto's lover as Bitch Cassidini!

2. I haven't been to Italy, but I am pretty sure that Sesame Ginger isn't a staple in the palate. So what's with the Italian Stallion storyline?

3. I desperately want to use the phrase "secretly propelled by charity" once in my life, hopefully referring to myself. But I won't have the cape or Clark Kent-esque spectacles. Or maybe I will.

I do highly recommend the dressing though - only 1.5g of fat per serving! And tasty. Any Nathan, all the money goes to charity. It automatically makes you a better person.

Fat Bastard.

In my career, I tend to run across some interesting statistics. More importantly, I tend to keep a pretty good feel on the pulse of corporate America, and the issues that they tend to be up in arms over. The following stats are taken from a corporate research paper - not an email forward complaining about the cost of gas.

In 2005, Lee Raymond, the former CEO of Exxon Mobil, was paid $34,457 per hour*.

In 1993, Lawrence Rawl, the CEO prior to Lee Raymond, and who retired on May 31, 1993, was paid $1,508 per hour*.

That’s a 2,184.95 percent increase.

Is Lee Raymond 22.85 times better a CEO than Lawrence Rawl? Is the company 22.85 times harder to run?

Total compensation for Lee Raymond in 2005 was $70,134,830.

Total compensation for Lawrence Rawl in 1993 was $2,929,056, based on annualized annual compensation of $2,279,707, plus long term compensation of $649,349.

I am not calling on all five of my readers to boycott gas, or write their Congressman, but simply to ponder these statistics and wonder what happened? When you are thinking about one-uping the neighbor with a bigger house, or truck, or vacation, think about ExxonMobile. Their standard response over the last 13 years has been that they pay to obtain and retain the best talent with a commensurate market rate.

Maybe it is time that society chills out and stems the tide of one-upmanship that has led to this type of ridiculous excess. Fat Bastard - I want my money back!

The Human Abstract Returns!

They say that pictures say a THOUSAND words. Well, let me throw this one on you...

My brother and his band "The Human Abstract" (see the links to their site on the right) played the same venue that countless huge acts have played before (The Doors, Velvet Underground, Rolling Stones...) It is late. Let the picture speak for me.

BBQ Madness! In action

So we have just discovered this fantastic new miniseries of a show on the Food Network, which is hosted by Alton Brown, called "Feasting on Asphalt". Basically Alton and a crew of guys are traveling around the country for one month, leaving from South Carolina, and ending up in Los Angeles. Their mission is to interview real people and experience true "road food". The only rule is that they can't step into a national chain, and aren't allowed a major interstate...back roads only. So far it has been an interesting show - one that I recommend highly, if only for its inspiring quality.




Watching the show the other night, the guys ended up in North Carolina, interviewing a father and son with long established roots in Barbeque. That's right, North Carolina vinegar based BBQ. I looked over at Liz, and with a twinkle in my eye, stated that "I would make me up some BBQ pork tomorrow!" So that's what I did. With my love's help making the sauce, and excellent book on BBQ with excellent techniques and recipes, we accomplished, in eight short hours, the pulled pork shoulder you see here. And man, it was GOOD!

Thanks Alton.

Comparison dog!

I have been reminded by Liz that I must post a comparison picture to Santa's Little Helper so that everyone can see how pretty my Maggie is.

Even though her nuclear piss is now on my downstairs carpet, we still allow her in the house...